You Dress To Honor Whom?

A couple of things happened this week that started me thinking about the way we dress, especially the way we women dress, because I am one.  Why do we dress the way we do?  What are we saying to the world?  Is our attire a reflection of who we are and what we believe?  So I ponder.

A young man that I know and care very much about is planning to become a pastor.  In fact it seems from his messages (he lives far from me) that he has already taken on that role, to an extent, in a local (for him) church.  This week I saw some photos of him and his fiancé.  I have never met this young lady, but I understand from others who have, that she is “a sweetie”.  But as I looked through the pictures it confounded me the way in which this beautiful young woman was dressed.  The dress she wore was so short that in one of the pictures you could see much more than you wanted to or should have, and even though it appeared there was a top under the dress bodice, it was cut low enough to see…well you get the picture.

At first I thought; “this young lady is planning on being a pastor’s wife, she is going to have to make some changes”.  Then I realized that it didn’t matter whose wife she was planning on being, or not being, someone needs to love her enough to tell her that the way she is dressing is saying things she doesn’t mean to say (hopefully).  And it isn’t just this precious girl, too many of us are deceived into thinking what we wear and how we dress is no big deal, but it is speaking volumes without us even saying a word.

Don’t just take my word for it or think this is just a “Christian” thing.  Read what the CarrerBuilders web site had to say. 

“Dressing for work can be a battle, but only if you don't know what you're doing. The way you look and dress in the office makes a statement about what people can expect from you and how you feel about yourself.”  (Carrerbuilders: “Dressing Appropriately at Work”)

“Sixty-four percent of employers surveyed have banned flip flops, while an additional 49 percent have forbidden mini-skirts. Thirty-eight percent banned sleeveless shirts and 28 percent have prohibited jeans. More than one-third (35 percent) of companies have gone as far as to send employees home for unsuitable work garb.” (Carrerbuilders: “Dressing For Success at Work”)

What have we done to ourselves?  What have we done to our daughters?  Why do employers have to take these steps?  How come we can’t figure this out for ourselves?  When did it become appropriate to dress like a “street walker”?  Our shirts and tops so low cut that our cleavage needs its own zip code.  Skirts and shorts so short that it brings a whole new meaning to mom saying; “Make sure you have on clean underwear.”  Jeans that are tight enough to cut off circulation and shirts with less cotton than an aspirin bottle.   Someone please tell when did this become an acceptable social norm?  Please tell me why we can’t encourage each other and expect from one another to dress modestly?

“On no, she said the M word.”  Yes, I did, but it’s not what you think.  When I say dress modestly I am not meaning women must wear a skirt of a certain length (and no shorter), dress as plain as the stereotypical “school marm”, or all the other things your mind can conjure up with disdain. 

Dressing modestly is simply dressing in a way that doesn’t draw attention to oneself.  I might draw attention to myself by dressing in low-cut, extremely tight, too short attire that screams; “Hey, look at me, I’m a hottie”.  I can also draw attention to myself by dressing in long skirts and dresses, baggie tops, drab attire that screams; “Hey, look at me, I am more righteous than most of you”.

Even more importantly, the way we dress not only tells everyone “how you feel about yourself” as stated by CarrerBuilders, but it also tells everyone what we believe about our God.  It tells them who we worship.  Hollywood and television are not the places that should determine how we dress, nor should the fashion industry.

Please don’t misunderstand me, I really like clothes and I like to look nice.  I can be as comfortable in a lovely dress as I am in jeans.  I never begrudge someone telling me I look great, or complementing my outfit.  But it is far more important that those around me see who I am and whose I am, not what I wear.

There is more to modesty than what we wear.  We can be immodest in our behavior as well (drawing attention to ourselves, again), but I will save that for another time.   May I encourage you and ask that you help me to encourage others, to dress in a manner that honors ourselves, honors our families, and most importantly, honors God.