Friday, February 3, 2012

The Pain Then...The Happiness Now


Yesterday was a beautiful 70 degree day, almost hot by February standards.  I know that winter has not yet sung her swan song for the year, but it was impossible not to enjoy the day for the wonderful surprise it happened to be.

But why could I enjoy that glorious day for the gift it was?  Because I know how cold and miserable some days can be.  I’m all in for the snow days, but those dreary, gray, soggy, freezing days can be hard to endure.  However, I would never know the joy of a sun filled, warm winter day if I didn’t know the angst of the gray and miserable day.

Isn’t that true of so much in our lives?  These past few weeks I have watched as too many families have faced unbelievable tragedy, or they are facing the long haul of chronic pain, either internal, or external.  A family has lost their son to war, another faces the excruciating rollercoaster ride of their daughters fight with cancer.  As I write, a family is waiting news of their wife/mom/sister/daughter’s surgery on a malignant brain tumor, and then the prognosis and treatment.

There is so much in life to bring us pain.  A misunderstanding with a true and dear friend, children that are following the wrong path, angry words with our spouse, the lost promotion, or even the lost job.  I could fill this blog with for- instances of things, significant and seemingly trivial (if it isn’t your issue), that cause us, to one degree or another, pain.  And let me just state here that whatever “degree” it presents itself, pain is awful, unpleasant, dreadful, and appalling.  But do you know what else it is?  It’s that thing that lets us know of something better.  Is there a name for that?

I can remember days when I didn’t know if death would come that night, or it would simply wait until the morning.  There was a time when I didn’t think I could make it through one more second, let alone a whole day.  Times when I was sure I would never have a friend again, and that no one ever truly loved me.  I have believed that I had been abandoned and no one cared.  Being on the edge, wondering if the bad news is coming tomorrow, is one of the worst places to be.  I know how to swallow hard when the diagnoses and prognosis are grim and you are trying so desperately to hang on.

But there is something almost too amazing to comprehend.  As Joy Lewis says to C.S. Lewis, in the movie “Shadow Lands”; “The pain then is part of the happiness now. That’s the deal.”  If we did not know pain we would never know joy.  Just like if we did not know darkness we would never recognize light.  One cannot come without the other.  Misunderstandings with friends show us the gift of true friendship and how valuable it is.  Angry words with our spouses simply remind us of the love between us and how priceless it is, making us work toward repair.

A son or daughter gone sooner that we ever wanted, helps us to cherish the moments we had and reminds us to make our time together count.  The awful, nasty treatments for cancer come right in the middle of laughter and hope, how is that possible?  The prognosis of a brain tumor reminds us how precious every second spent together really is.  Losing a job or missing a promotion is an opportunity to find joy in doing better and persevering, not to mention the joy found in trusting in our Great Provider, God.

“The pain then is part of the happiness now”, like it or not, that really is the deal.  And I can’t help but wonder if being here, on this earth, living through the pain and the joy, will be that same “thing” that shows us just how glorious being with the LORD will be.


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